Sometime before Monday

This baby will be born! Time is going all too fast and so slow. I can't believe I have made it this far. I have two days before the scheduled birth of my last child. Please Lord give me comfort and allow me to go into labor before then. I don't want this to happen without your timing.

I went to see the Dr. yesterday and she basically just told me that I'm a walking time bomb. Baby is at a -1 station and I am effaced. Obviously I am not dilated since my body doesn't work that way. I think I have been losing parts of my mucus plug. I'm pretty sure anyway. SOOOOOOOOOOOO many contractions! Its getting harder to make them stop. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...........

Still holding at a 32 pound weight gain, according to the Dr.s office. At home it's a 30 LB gain. WoHoooooo! Hope I can lose it all this time. Surely the next time I blog it will be about my beautiful daughter and our hospital experience.

Adios

Big girls don't cry?

Let me tell you, I am a very big girl at the moment, and I cry about everything! What is it with my emotions this time around? I don't remember being this way with either of the boys. I cried after dropping A.J. off at kindergarten. I remembered his lunch, supplies, vitamin, to brush his teeth and style his hair, Ben's stroller, and we were 5 minutes early. But I forgot to take pictures. I feel awful! What kind of mom would do such a thing? I guess the kind that is thirty eight weeks pregnant and can't remember anything to save her life. I know I am a good mom, but this morning, I wasn't good enough. I will get pictures after school I guess. I feared this when I found out my due date. That him starting school around the same time I'm due would be hard. I guess the end is near and all I can do is put on my happy face for him and share his excitement. Pics to come.........

Not good at sharing......

As an adult I'm sure most people would think that I have learned this task but over time I have realized that I am not very good at sharing. How can I expect my children to learn this if I don't like to do it. Do I really want them to share? I guess most things yes.

For instance, we did our school supplies shopping which I was actually excited about. I have always enjoyed buying new school supplies for as long as I remember. I now understand why my parents disliked it so much. It can be fun until you get down to the details. The list asked for a 48 count of construction paper times 6. The packages come in 40 count. So do you buy an extra package and why does each student need so much paper anyway. You can't convince me that my 5 year old is going to use all of that paper. The spiral notebook that they ask for is supposed to be 70 pages. Well we found 60 and 80. Go figure. They ask for 3 school glues and three glue sticks. You have to be kidding me. Come to find out all these supplies are shared. What if my kid wants the specials and another kid doesn't get them. Like the glitter glue or the action figure scissors with the spinning head. Do these specials go into the community box and he gets them if he gets lucky? That isn't fair. Are we conforming to private school where every kid has to have the same and look the same to avoid conflict? Anyway, back to not sharing. Here is a list of things I don't like to share.

My food
My drinks
Friends- I get jealous :/
Bed space
Bath stuff
Makeup
My husband's time

Some things I don't mind sharing- in small quantities.

18 days and counting

I got rid of the counter because it kept messing up. Annoying! Anyway, I went to my last appointment with Dr. High Risk today. He didn't measure my cervix because baby estimated 7 lbs and 4 oz and looks very healthy. He said she could be born any day and be just fine. If I make it another 2 weeks she could weigh around 8.4 lbs. Healthy girl!! I go see my OBGYN tomorrow and she might check to see if my cervix is doing anything. My Braxton Hicks contractions are getting stronger and more frequent. I lost a pound! That is normal for me. Now I get to go buy fabric this afternoon for the crib bumpers. Yea!

Making it..... until lunch time....

You would have to get a second opinion from Andy, but I feel like I am the most irritable with this pregnancy. I do pretty good from the time Ben gets up around 7-ish, until lunch around 1-ish. From then until bedtime, I am the last person anyone would want to be around. I find myself apologizing to A.J. and Ben a few times each afternoon and they are both very forgiving. Andy just brushes it off and starts his day over every ten minutes or so. Poor thing. Last night he made the comment "I can't wait until Micah gets here." Of course I read into it, "I can't wait for this pregnancy to be over." I am sure I had been short with him just before. It isn't just my huge uncomfortable body that doesn't feel like it belongs to me anymore. It isn't just the heat that seems to be surrounding me in a huge bubble everywhere I go. I also get the pleasure of being a host to an unknown parasite living next door to my unborn child. Yes I know! I have found a few long spaghetti like creatures in my stools and will be dropping off a sample to the Dr. sometime in the next few days. Please pray that Micah is not harmed and that I can be safely rid of these things.

Thanks!

Dr.

Another perfect stress test! She is definitely a happy baby. I do have a pulled muscle from choking on some water. It is a lot better now. Holding steady on the weight. That is about it. Not too exciting.
later-

Diaper bags

I have looked at so many diaper bags! Found a lot that I liked and were definitely out of my price range. Wouldn't you know my favorite one, I got on clearance for $12.00 at TJMAX! I thought I would give between 20-40 for one but this is awesome!

This has been my favorite so far!

I love the options on the strap! And the front pocket is very functional. should have taken a picture of the inside.

It all sets in....

Wow, it is already starting. I have been a little stressed. What will the first month with my daughter be like. Will anyone understand! Do I really have to explain myself? Can't my husband just read my mind and handle everything for me. Visitors, visitors, visitors. Doesn't the answer no mean anything? I just want to take care of my baby with my husband and anyone who wants to help out there are a million other things we need help with. Until the post pardum and newness wears off. Then you can change diapers if you really just have the urge. Will I remember all this for when my kids have their babies. Am I just being hormonal, or selfish, or both?

Nesting...........that is what I have been doing! I have a whole weeks worth of last minute things to do. But not yet. The next two weeks will consist of partially resting, getting my household on a school based sleep schedule, and preparing for the inevitable, Emotional havoc. I already question my own reasoning for anything I feel. Does that make any sense? I know how I want things to work out but does that offend anyone and do I really have any say? Is anyone I know going to try to come in and take over? Probably not, but that is a fear of mine. Wow, I really need to see a professional about my control issues. Maybe it is a fear of failure as a Mother. Is that why I am so controlling? HMMMMM?

That Phase.......

Some of you know exactly what I'm talking about. My son, soon to be 6, has entered the stage in his life where he thinks everything is cool. Even when it isn't. He comes up with some of the goofiest scenarios. I know it is great that he is thinking about cause and effect. Sometimes I don't really know how to respond without shooting him down. For instance, he will say something like, "Hey Mommy, what if lalalalalala blahblahblah lalalalala." and then I am like " Well, then lalalalalala blahblahblah lalalalalala." Catch my drift? Anyway, I'm praying that some of this calms down when he starts kindergarten. I love my son and his imagination. Sometimes I love them separately. So I am asking for input from any of you Moms of grade school children. Where do I go with this?